Posted on October 21, 2021 by Emily Forbes

As a personal trainer, often my clients come in telling me all the things they didn’t do or that were “negative”. I hear “I should have done this” “I shouldn’t have done that”. I like to change a clients focus and ask them what they did do well, what they managed to achieve and get them to celebrate their wins.

The problem with focusing on the “negative” (or rather the things we don’t want) is that’s where are attention goes. There is a saying which goes “energy flows where attention goes”. If we are always saying to ourselves “I don’t want to be fat, I don’t want to be fat, I don’t want to be fat” all our energy is going towards the thing we don’t want. This is also what we can call “away from motivation”, it is a fear based motivation. Flip this around and start saying to yourself “I want to be healthy, I want to be strong, I want to be confident”. Energy flows towards the thing we do want.

Also, beware of your inner critic talking badly about yourself all the time. You may have come across the “talking badly to plants experiment”? Basically, plants were grown under the same conditions except one of them was spoken badly to/bullied and the other was given words of praise/love/encouragement. At the end of the experiment the plant which was spoken negatively to wilted/died and the one which was spoken to positively thrived. So, when talking to yourself be kind, be your own cheerleader, give yourself words of praise and encouragement.

So start celebrating your wins. Congratulate yourself on all the things you did well. A gratitude journal can also help bring more positivity into our life. Just 5 minutes a day being thankful for all the things we do have and inviting in more of that. Focus on things which help you move TOWARDS the things you DO want and start thriving!

Emily x